On Chol Hamoed Succos, my beloved Bubby passed away. My grandmother was sick for a few months, but she was not old. Not her.
My grandmother was highly social and fun-loving. She had the best sense of humor. She loved people and being in touch with people, not only her children and grandchildren but her sisters, nephews and nieces and their children, and her numerous friends. (How many granddaughters can rattle off a list of half a dozen of their grandmother’s best friends?)
My family used to spend Pesach (the whole week!) with my mother’s parents. We saw them every summer, too. We made so many childhood memories with them. My grandfather z”l passed away when I was 19, but my grandmother continued to be a huge part of my life.
This year I was able to get to know my grandmother more intimately, through the Storyworth program. We got through about 20 questions before it became hard for my grandmother to continue.
I tried to capture her responses as she verbally gave them to me. Here are some excerpts.
What simple pleasure of life do you truly enjoy?
My pleasures in life are spending time with my children and grandchildren. I love my grandchildren. It makes me the happiest when I see and speak to my grandchildren and my great-grandchildren, when they come to visit. Seeing smiles on my grandchildren’s faces couldn’t be better or nicer for me.
Playing piano relaxes me.
These are the things that give me simchas hachaim. Not material things. Just good times, happy times. This is what life is all about.
Do you have any advice for making a house feel more like a home?
A house is bricks and wood. But a home is the warmth of the people who live there. And how does the warmth come out? By being positive, by having an open door, by having guests over. A home is when you have company and everyone is welcome.
What are the most important lessons you’ve learned in life?
Go with your gut feeling. Speak to someone who is older and went through something similar to what you’re going through, and they can advise you a little bit. But then go with your gut feeling. Because no situation is the same.
What advice would you give to future generations of your family?
The most important advice I can give is to keep close to the family. Family members are the ones who really care. Through thick and thin, they’ll always be there. Be in touch with them always. Remember to connect in the good times, too, not just hard times.
I would suggest not getting upset about anything that won’t matter in a week or a few days. We do this often and then we regret it later — what was I so upset about?
Be happy with simple things every day.
Time goes by very quickly. Be happy if you hear about a simcha. Be involved. When you go to someone’s simcha, you make them so happy. And you create closeness with them.
The only thing I can say is bila hamaves lanetzach…and now I wait for the day when I see my four grandparents again.
