A while ago I wrote about how I am comfortable with my married friends because most of them got married after some time in shidduchim and we can still relate to each other. Recently, I ventured into new terrain — reconnecting with married classmates who I have not been in touch with for awhile and/or who got married a long …
I feel like I am Alice, fallen down the rabbit hole to Wonderland, where everyone has their own logic and nothing actually makes sense. I say one thing and the person I’m talking to hears another and I’m pretty sure I was clear but maybe I don’t speak the right language for this particular setting? Or I mosey along …
I recently listened to an Ohel webinar with Dr. Edith Eva Eger (author of the incredible memoir The Choice). One thought she shared in particular made me gasp, it was so powerful and exactly what I needed to hear. Dr. Eger shared that what got her through Auschwitz and the war was curiosity. She wanted, just enough, to see what …
A wonderful reader asked for a post on the topic of the fear of change, specifically as it crops up when dating someone. I think this is a great and relatable topic. These are my thoughts: Change brings up a lot of fear. It’s natural to want to stick with a known situation rather than step into the unknown. …
A friend shared a visual with me a few years ago that helped me see anger in a new and less stigmatizing way. Anger is like a suit of armor that shields you from experiencing softer and more painful emotions like sadness, grief, and disappointment. Anger is like the tip of an iceberg. When you look beneath the surface, you …
I once learned that geese fly in a V formation to save energy. Each bird flies in the updraft created by the bird in front of it, which helps the geese preserve energy and fly longer distances at a time. When the lead bird gets tired, it drops back and another bird takes the lead. This is a great …
I read a great article from The Atlantic about the power of recording and sharing our rejections with a group of peers. The concept of a “rejection collection” was developed by cognitive psychologist Barbara Sarnecka and two graduate students as a way of encouraging academics to keep trying for goals like jobs, awards, and grants without being discouraged by rejection: …
My grandfather was niftar this week. I don’t usually share details about my family but I would like to share a bit about his life.
Before we can have a conversation about your wonderful shidduch suggestion for me or your wonderful advice for how I should be doing things differently, I am going to need you to define the following:
A reader shared that it can be irritating when people write off her struggles in shidduchim because “you’re not so old.” I empathize with that and I really don’t think it’s fair to compare, because no one has a monopoly on pain. Where do comparisons end? After all, 22 isn’t 27 isn’t 33 isn’t 39. Each stage comes with …
