Recently, I remembered an odd experience I had several years ago, the likes of which I had not had before and haven’t since. I had borrowed a book about dating from a friend. I knew, on a visceral level, that I really did not need to and probably should not read any more advice about dating. Yet a part of me still grasped at the possibility of there being another avenue I had not tried, another insight that might be held within the pages of a book, that would be my answer, that would lead to my breakthrough. I had the book on my shelf for awhile, then one night, I picked it up to read, ignoring the actual physical resistance I felt to adding yet another voice to the cacophony in my head and heart. And that’s when the strange thing happened. I looked at the page and forgot how to read. I cannot really explain it any other way. I saw the black shapes of letters on the page but I couldn’t read words. I looked for a few moments, then closed the book and never opened it again.
I am so amazed at the intelligent operations of the human mind. It said no, because I couldn’t.
(Photo credit: Suzy Hazelwood/Pexels)
Good for you!
I don’t recommend it as a dating book, but I’m curious if you ever read Marry Him by Lori Gottlieb and what your thoughts were?
I have not read it – I heard about it years ago and had an aversion to it at the time. Now, I could be misjudging it but it seems like the kind of book I should stay away from given the above experience…I am curious to hear your thoughts if you’ve read it, though!!
Mixed feelings about it. I like Lori Gottlieb’s other book (Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) better. (It contains adult content.)
I happen to think she makes many excellent points that are relevant to American society as a whole. I don’t know that getting stuck on superficialities and chasing Prince Charming-esque chemistry is exactly the problem in our frum society, though.
I also read it when I was young enough that I was able to nod along without feeling personally attacked and judged.
I totally hear all these points! There is probably a lot of truth to her message but it might not be the message for everyone…and for some of us (like me), advice can be pretty toxic…Thanks for sharing your thoughts!