How Many Left?

My sister’s classmate recently got engaged. When she shared the news with someone, that person immediately asked, “So, how many left in your class?”

 

The two of us instinctively looked at each other because that is a question neither of us appreciates. (And, might I add, I have a question in response: How is the answer going to help you?)

 

My high school class will always hold a special place in my heart, but…we’re just not a cohort anymore. We’re each living our own lives now the way Hashem meant for us to live. Whose success is it when the countdown reaches “0”?

 

As we’ve talked about before, your life is not lived relative to anyone else’s. There’s no scoreboard and no stopwatch. You will get married at the right time to the right person — with the help of Hashem! You have your own road to travel. Your classmates have their own tests to pass. That’s how life works. We cannot simplify our stories down to tally marks and checklists. That would be a betrayal of what our stories mean.

 

There is just one you and there is a plan just for you. No one, from the benignly curious to the sincerely well-meaning to the determined prophet of doom, has permission to reduce you to a number.

 

So if you do get asked, “How many left?,” you can simply respond, “You know, I never thought of counting.”

 

Agree? Disagree? I would love to hear your thoughts!

One comment

  1. s.

    i love the pics that you include in the posts! always a great choice!

    definitely pretty insensitive of that person….

    i’ve been realizing more and more lately that other people’s insecurities are usually why they feel the need to put other people down.

    good answer!

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