Continuing on with my notes from Burnout, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. This concept is so interesting and provides a whole new way of mentally working with expectations, struggle, and patience: Your brain has a system for monitoring the ratio of effort to success you’re experiencing as you work towards a goal. It then compares this ratio with what …
A few weeks ago I wrote about my Creative Arts class in graduate school and how it reintroduced me to poetry therapy. Here are a few more poems to read, play with, and respond to in addition to the ones I shared there. I’d love to discover more gems if you can share in the comments! “For a New …
I’m finishing up a book called Burnout, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. (Because I feel somewhat responsible for the books I mention here, I can tell you that some parts of this one are really helpful, informative and scientific, and others are oddly political and ideological so I skipped those). The book discusses how to deal with chronic stress that …
A reader pointed out to me that I often suggest getting a dating coach or mentor to talk to before and during a dating relationship but I haven’t provided much information about how to find one. I’ve been fortunate to have a lot of support with dating in recent years but I know it can be hard to find someone …
Hey, everyone. Something small I started doing frequently is turning my phone onto airplane mode. When I do that, I’ll often turn wifi off, as well. My phone basically becomes a clock and note-taking device. Which is fine, because when I’m trying to work or do schoolwork or cook or go for a walk, I really don’t need my phone …
Hey, all, let’s continue talking about dating through the lens of mindfulness. Last time we looked at pre-first date anxiety and ways to help yourself through that. Now let’s look at the first date itself. First dates are really nerve-wracking. Second and third dates etc, also. But first dates are uniquely nerve-wracking because there’s that Big Reveal. The …
I finished The Giver, by Lois Lowry, for the first time last week. I had started it years ago and dropped it in middle because I found it disturbing, but one of my students had to read it so I read it too. I still find it disturbing but also moving and profound. The story centers around Jonas, an …
Wow. We have finally arrived at the end of 2020. Back in January, I made a list of twenty items I wanted to try and accomplish this year. Now I’ll review them! Get married. Ok, at the time of my writing this list, this first item was actually paired in my head with… Move to Eretz Yisroel. The reason …
Last week I enjoyed a long-awaited trip to the Met. I was so happy to finally be going back. It was already a few years since my last visit. I haven’t been on vacation since last summer but a trip to the Met is a little tiny bit like a vacation. I wanted to do an exercise I’d read …
So far we looked at suggestion-dread and shidduch research. I wanted to talk a bit about anxiety before a first date because that used to knock me flat. It’s a lot easier for me now but still not always a picnic. When I use the term anxiety here, I don’t mean it lightly: dating really triggers situational anxiety in …
