I told my uncle about a dilemma I have regarding guys who are interested in going out with me but who are not what I am looking for. I continue to struggle to find the balance between thoroughness and diligence, which feel productive and self-determined, and guilt and anxiety, which disempower me and make me feel compelled to do things …
What might it be like to get to know someone through writing letters instead of dating? Couldn’t that be a nice change, and revealing in refreshing ways? I think I could be more real and true to myself given the time to formulate what I want to say and the safety of the page to say it.(And wouldn’t this make …
My sister pointed out that timing can mean the difference between success or failure. If you want to buy a house, but you can’t afford it, then even if you find a great house in a great neighborhood at an objectively good price, it’s not good for you. It will be a headache and a strain and you will risk …
If you had to choose a spice to represent you, what would you choose? I’m going with cinnamon – warm and comforting and a little spicy. Yes, this is reference to an item I came across regarding a new collaborative cookbook which features a dish or spice in the opening spread to represent each author, in lieu of printing …
Recently I asked a friend to contact someone we both know and find out if he’d go out with me. It was a reach, and he said no. I was definitely very disappointed. But instead of being hard on myself for putting myself out there, I remembered the famous Wayne Gretzky line: “You miss one hundred percent of the shots …
Hello, all. Please fill out my 60-second questionnaire! Thanks! Everything about shidduchim takes SO LONG. Phone tag, waiting to hear back from people, should-I-shouldn’t-I-follow-up… “He’s busy, he has to get back to me, call me next week, text me a reminder, I’m going out of town, I’m making a wedding, they’re making a wedding, I didn’t hear from …
Someone in my family once sent me a long text about a guy I said no to, asking if I was “100% sure” I wasn’t interested, stating that “normal guys are very few and far between” and if I said no there was a “99% chance he would never say yes again.” Reading these things was obviously very triggering. …
A reader asked for a post on the topic of developing an independent life while you are living at home (with your parents). This is a great question. My first thought is that independence is largely a state of mind. The stage from about ages 18-29 is known as emerging adulthood in psychology. It’s when we learn about ourselves …
The following excerpt is from The Midnight Library, by Matt Haig, a novel I loved so much (but which isn’t for everyone; the language is really not great). This passage made me cry. “You need to realize something if you are ever to succeed at chess,” she said… “And the thing you need to realize is this: the game …
Back when I posted the survey (Pesach time), someone asked if I could write about my relationship with my younger married sister. At the time I wasn’t ready to share but now more time has passed and I would like to. I’ll begin with where we are today which is: Our relationship is completely normal (thank You, Hashem!! more …
