Hi, everyone. Last week we started working through the six steps in the book Meeting Your Half-Orange, by Amy Spencer. To recap, the first step is to connect to the belief inside of you that you truly can have the relationship you dream of, focus on improving the quality of your thoughts around dating and marriage, and frame your thoughts in terms of what you do want and not what you don’t. If you want to keep working on that before moving to step #2, that’s totally fine, but you don’t need to be perfect at any of the steps before moving forward, just conscious of them and making them a part of your life.
Here are the main ideas for step #2:
Truly, deeply and honestly admit that you want your dream relationship. It’s understandable to detach or distance yourself from the desire to have one, especially after you’ve dealt with a lot of disappointment. But because we attract what we think about, focus on, and feel (see step #1), just being “open” to something changing doesn’t have quite the energy as stating that you deeply want something to happen. You can still be a happy single and have a great life. But the desire to get married has to be very real and very much something you are focused on and open about in order to move through the half-orange process.
When you talk about meeting the right person, listen to your tone, which matters quite a bit. Strive to be as authentic and enthusiastic about it as you are about other things that energize you (a vacation, a new nephew). Starting this week, make it a daily practice of looking in the mirror and saying, “I am going to marry a great guy!” “I am going to have a beautiful family!” As Amy says, speak with exclamation points! Even if you have a million doubts in your head, for a few minutes a day, focus on your positive beliefs about dating and marriage and say them out loud with your whole being. (If you link this with another daily habit, like applying moisturizer, that can help you stick with it day after day. Place reminders on your mirror if that helps.)
So, we’ll work on step #2 and reconvene next week! And if you’re still on step #1, that’s fine too!
