I haven’t done a journaling post in a long while and I’m sorry to admit that I haven’t journaled in a long while either. But I have soo much just swirling through my head between everything that’s been going on out there and also in my personal life, so I’m posting this as a reminder to myself to dive back in.
Sometimes we hesitate to be entirely honest about our thoughts or feelings, especially when a critical inner voice tells us we are being unrealistic, petty, or ungrateful. It can be hard to acknowledge fear, disappointment, or anger. However, if you try to censor your writing and only put down what is socially acceptable, your journal will quickly become a source of stress in your life. You need some place where you can drop everything without fear of judgment.
It’s helpful to remember that your journal is an inanimate object. It cannot think or feel and it cannot repeat anything you write in it. You can even tear out pages and rip them up if you never wish to reread what you wrote. But it’s only by being entirely honest that you can truly have a release and get all that stuff out of your system.
When you feel the urge to sugarcoat or edit your journal entry, write about that, too, instead of letting it keep you from telling the whole truth: “I’m trying to figure out just what was so disappointing about my Yom Tov and this critical voice keeps telling me to stop being negative. But something really bothered me and I have to get to the bottom of it…”
The more often you write, and the quicker you write, the more easily you will tell the whole truth and get to the other side.
Now on to it!
I really was never the “journaling’ kind of person. But what can I say- shidduchim has changed me in many ways:)
Almost a year ago I started a journal called “one line a day” (they sell them on amazon, as well as “one question a day” versions). Each page has the date (you fill in the year) and 5 entry spots (so it will span 5 years imh). I sometimes fall behind and have to fill in a few days at a time, and my thoughts often spill over into sticky notes that I add.
I love it, and I am excited to begin my second year and to see each day where I was and what I was dealing with exactly the year(s) before.
I highly recommend!
One question- sometimes I have a difficult/hurtful interaction with someone and I am never sure if I should write the full details or not. Will it bring back feelings of aggravation and ill will when I read it again in a year? Isn’t this why we have an issur of lashon hara? At the same time, it is something that I am dealing with that I want to put down! Does anyone ever have this dilemma?
I actually also have a line-a-day journal, I even wrote a post on it 🙂 I haven’t been so good about filling it in since COVID but it was really cool to be able to look back on the whole 2019 and see what happened every day!
I do write about negative experiences in my full-length journal and sometimes I’ll allude to them in the line-a-day journal (ex. “Had a really hard time with __). I’m not sure if this is an issur to be honest. My journals are super-personal and I don’t share them with anyone. I do read them over. I don’t find that they bring up ill feelings against the people I wrote about, more like, sigh…that was rough. On the other hand, expressing the experience in writing helps me get over it faster.
maybe you can write the lashon hara parts on a sticky note and pull it out and throw it away the next day?
This is such a great suggestion.