A Game of Perfect Matches

This past Shabbos I had a really fun time with a friend…playing Perfect Matches! Now, I’ve mentioned on this blog that I don’t enjoy question-answer dating games and in the past, I didn’t. But revisiting the game now, I see that I actually find it really fun to answer the questions! I think it’s because I’ve evolved and gotten to …

Mindful Dating: Post-Date Processing

Hi, all, finally picking up the series again. When I left off, you were implementing your post-date self-care plan and getting ready to process your date.   So, you came home from your date and to the best of your ability you were really on that date, just being present, so now you get to process.   Here are some things that …

Luggage Carousel

Here’s another dating metaphor that’s been helping me recently. This is something that comes up a lot for people who have been dating for a few years or longer — the phenomenon 😉 of hearing only repeat suggestions for a while. It can get to a point where you really believe there is no one else out there. I know …

Mindful Dating: Post-Date Self-Care Plan

A great strategy for mindful dating is to develop a self-care plan to implement after every date (not just the first but I’m inserting this mini-post here). To be most effective, this should be planned and ready to go in advance of the date so you have something cozy and supportive to look forward to no matter what happens. I …

Your Brain On Expectation Vs. Reality

Continuing on with my notes from Burnout, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. This concept is so interesting and provides a whole new way of mentally working with expectations, struggle, and patience:   Your brain has a system for monitoring the ratio of effort to success you’re experiencing as you work towards a goal. It then compares this ratio with what …

Dating Coaches

A reader pointed out to me that I often suggest getting a dating coach or mentor to talk to before and during a dating relationship but I haven’t provided much information about how to find one. I’ve been fortunate to have a lot of support with dating in recent years but I know it can be hard to find someone …

Mindful Dating: The First Date

Hey, all, let’s continue talking about dating through the lens of mindfulness. Last time we looked at pre-first date anxiety and ways to help yourself through that. Now let’s look at the first date itself.   First dates are really nerve-wracking. Second and third dates etc, also. But first dates are uniquely nerve-wracking because there’s that Big Reveal.   The …

Mindful Dating: Pre-First Date Anxiety

So far we looked at suggestion-dread and shidduch research. I wanted to talk a bit about anxiety before a first date because that used to knock me flat. It’s a lot easier for me now but still not always a picnic.   When I use the term anxiety here, I don’t mean it lightly: dating really triggers situational anxiety in …

Challah Update

Hi, all. It’s been awhile since my post about baking challah so I wanted to share an update. A few weeks after I started baking, one of my challah tutor’s kids was quarantined so I didn’t want to go to her house on Thursday night and I almost skipped baking that week. However, one of my friends insisted that I …

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